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The feeding fetish

Sexuality is a complex topic. Many people feel an almost inexplicable sexual attraction towards certain things or practices - a fetish. Fat fetishism is a sexual preference in which overweight or obese people are eroticised. There are many nuances to this. Feeding or feederism is one of them. It is not about mere curves, but about weight gain itself.

Definition: What is feeding?

Eating is erotic. Most people more or less agree with this. Many have already fed their partner chocolate-covered strawberries or licked whipped cream off each other's bodies. Certain foods are also thought to have an aphrodisiac effect.

Feederism (also called feeding) is a sexual fetish that elevates food to an even higher level. Feeding is about the act of feeding and the effect that the food has. In a feeding relationship, there are usually clearly defined roles: the role of the encourager (feeder) and the role of the eater (feedee).

In the media, mostly heterosexual feeding relationships are portrayed, where a mostly slim man encourages an overweight woman to gain weight. But feeding is not tied to gender roles or sexuality. There are also homosexual couples with a feeding fetish. Likewise, there are slim women who find it erotic when their male partners take on the role of the eater.

Important terms in the field of feeding explained


Feederism belongs to the area of fat fetishism. The sexual satisfaction here does not come from simply admiring curvy bodies. Rather, it is about the process of helping one's partner gain weight. The act of eating (feeding) and the effect that eating has are eroticised. For some people, eating is enough to make them feel full and flabby without any actual weight gain. For other people, feeding is primarily about gaining weight.

As with any fetish, a lot of feeding takes place in the mind. Not everything that is dreamed about or talked about actually happens. This is the case with every fetish. For example, by no means all people who find BDSM erotic live out this fetish in real life around the clock.

Many people who find Feeding erotic are aware that overeating and being overweight can lead to problems. Therefore, they only want to act out the Feeding fetish to the point where it does not put a strain on their health. For other people, however, going beyond these limits can be an important part of the feeding fetish.

Feedee - the eater or the fed.

There are two sides to a feeding relationship. The feedee is the person who is fed or eats. Many women and men who self-identify as feedees find the idea or the actual physical act of eating a lot and/or gaining weight sexually stimulating.

It can thus be said that a Feedee is someone who likes to be fed or gain weight.

In heterosexual circles the term feedee is common, while in homosexual circles it is more common to speak of gainer.

It is important to emphasise that feedees come in all shapes and sizes. Not all Feedees aim to become obese through Feeding!

Feeder - the one who feeds.

A feeder is someone who enjoys watching another person eat and gain weight. The term is mainly established among heterosexuals. Among homosexuals, it is often referred to as an encourager.

As a feeder or encourager, one experiences sexual satisfaction in feeding or even fattening another person. Most feeders have a relatively clear idea of how fat their ideal feedee should be.

The feeder's motivation can vary. On the one hand, it can be about dominance. By influencing what and how much the feedee consumes, the feeder exercises power over the feedee. In this context, there are a variety of different fantasies, but not everyone who identifies as a feeder or feedee feeding erotic follows them.

On the other hand, the feeder's motivation may stem from the fact that he or she wants a partner who is as fat and curvy as possible. Feeding is the chosen way to make the ideal a reality.

Another motivation may be to take care of a dependent person who is no longer able to manage daily tasks on his or her own due to obesity.

Feeding versus Fat Fetish: What is the difference between a feeder and a fat admirer?

There is no scientific consensus on what constitutes a fat admirer. However, the term is commonly used to describe a person who finds overweight or obese people erotic. While the media mostly portrays men as fat admirers, there are also women who find overweight or obese men more erotic than slim men. And fat admirers can also be found in the LGBTQ+ community. Fat admirers have a fat fetish (fat fetishism or "fat fetish" in English), so they find fatter and curvier bodies more beautiful. Most fat admirers have more precise ideas about the ideal figure of their partner.

A clear distinction between a fat fetish and feederism is that in feederism the path to the goal is part of the erotic pleasure. In other words, people who identify with feederism find it erotic to watch other people eat and gain weight. Fat Admirers, on the other hand, do not experience sexual satisfaction from seeing their partner eat a lot or gain weight. Fat admirers appreciate the finished "product", so to speak - the round soft body. They are simply fat admirers. Gaining or losing weight does not matter as much to fat admirers as it does to feeders.

For Feeders, on the other hand, the act of eating and gaining weight is stimulating. There are many fantasies in Feeding that are about how the fed consumes large amounts of calories or how the progress of weight gain is monitored and documented. Feeding, then, is all about the process. True, for some feeders there may be a clear goal of how fat they want their feedee to become. But they have consciously found a partner with whom they want to achieve this goal together. They did not choose a person who is already that fat.

Subcategories in the area of feederism.

Feeding can involve different fantasies from person to person. While some feedeing relationships are about maintaining the health and autonomy of both partners, there are other fantasies.

The Weigh Gain Fantasy is simply about the feedee gaining weight. Usually, progress is documented. The weight gain is often meant to stay within a range that does not restrict the Feedee's mobility or health.

The Force Feeding Fantasy is about the feeder feeding or fattening his feedee partly against his will. In addition to calorie-rich junk food, specially prepared fat shakes are also used.

The Force Feeding Fantasy is reinforced in the Machine Feeding Fantasy. Here, the feedee is connected to a machine and partly fixed to hands and feet. A high-calorie food mash is fed into the Feedee's mouth via the machine. Partly this is to achieve that the fedee can hardly move and is dependent on the feeder.

As always in the area of sexuality, feeding fantasies are not necessarily acted out. It is often enough to imagine things in order to achieve sexual satisfaction.

What do men find attractive about plus size women?

Although very thin women have been presented as the ideal in the media for years, many men find plus-size women more attractive than slim women. Plus size is considered to be above the "normal" sizes - i.e. in the plus size range. Finding chubby women more attractive does not necessarily have anything to do with feeding. It is more likely to be fat admirers.

While some men prefer their women just a little rounder and curvier and belong to a so-called chubby fetish, that's not enough for other men. They want BBW (stands for "Big Beautiful Women") or even fuller SSBBW (stands for "Super Sized Big Beautiful Woman").

In general, men find chubby women more attractive because the female curves are particularly marked. Chubby women tend to have larger breasts and a larger bottom. Bottom and breasts are the main features that men find sexually attractive in women.

In addition, the sensation of touch is also different. Voluptuous women, be they in the Chubby, Big or Super Sized range, simply feel softer to the touch. Many men enjoy the soft, curvy body of their partner during sex.